It is in moments of transition that life asks us who we are, not who we want to be, but who we are in the present. Really, the present is all we have for sure.
This question of our identity can be scary, tricky, and sometimes confusing.
There is the part of us that may want to protect itself, another part that wants to please or rebel from others, a part that wants to conform to society or a particular group–but who are we when everything fades and our souls are still and breathing in pure solitude?
I have realized that:
If it weren’t for the risks, I wouldn’t be here.
If it weren’t for the support I have received from people who love me and believed in me, I wouldn’t be here.
If it weren’t for the tears that cleansed my soul, I wouldn’t be here.
If it weren’t for my stubborn determination to make it despite not taking the typical path or coming from the typical background, I wouldn’t be here.
If it weren’t for the times I put myself in uncomfortable situations that forced me to grow, I wouldn’t be here.
And above all, if it weren’t for God and His patience with my growing faith, I wouldn’t be here. He has an amazing plan.
The most unexpected things have happened. I have learned that life ends up being all about the people who surround you and the times you fight mano a mano (hand-to-hand) with fear and the bad that attempts to disarm you.
What has brought you to where you are? Where do you want to be? And what can you do now to get there?
May. It’s over. I can’t believe it. Law school. It’s over. I can’t believe it.
This month was so hardcore. So many emotions. It’s an end. It’s a beginning.
This month, I lost a friend and mentor to cancer. That was very tough and unexpected. Some unexpected things were bad, other unexpected things were good, very good. The month had its joy and sadness.
In other ways, the month was dreamy. Sometimes, it felt like I was walking a tightrope. Me, trying not to lose myself in a dreamy world with no time, and at the same time, trying not to fall into a pool of stressful realities. My feet touched the water on both sides, but alas, I think I am now safe on the tightrope, again. Or as safe as you can be on one, anyway.
The key, as always, is to be grateful in the state we are in.
I’ll embrace the hellos that June will bring, and I am making my goodbyes the best I could leave behind.
And to those I will see again– I’ll see you in a bit.
Let the summer adventures begin!
Bring it, June.
“Anxiety, heartbreak, and tenderness mark the in-between state. It’s the kind of place we usually want to avoid. The challenge is to stay in the middle rather than buy into struggle and complaint. The challenge is to let it soften us rather than make us more rigid and afraid.” Pema Chödrön
1] I found Suits to be a fantastic legal drama. Tardy to the party. Loving Harvey Specter. The 10 Things We Can Learn From Harvey Specter was interesting. There is a lot to learn from the charismatic dream attorney.
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“Nothing that has happened to you gets the final sentence on who you are. The final word is His, and His hands say everything.” J.S.
*Since this article, The Mindy Project was picked up by Hulu. I am still praying someone will pick up Cristela.
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“She was beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines. She was beautiful, for the way she thought. She was beautiful, for the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. No, she wasn’t beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful, deep down to her soul.” F. Scott Fitzgerald
5] A friend shared this moving video, and I had to share.
Ink Talks: Singing in The Lifeboat
6] Loved this surprise, and Mayra Castillo’s work is fantastic. We may not be Ellen or Danilo, but let’s always take a moment to recognize those around us who inspire us.
7] Dancing Through the Ages: Dancing with the Stars
8] Val and Rumer winning the Mirror Ball Trophy. They were my team. Rumer inspired me so much about what it means to be uniquely yourself, and how we can find strength in vulnerability. Anything can happen.
I still can’t get enough of these two dancing…
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“When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability… To be alive is to be vulnerable.” Madeleine L’Engle
10] Always working on letting go of fear…
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“The best way to show people that God is everything we say He is – is for us to be everything He says we are. Become love.” Bob Goff
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“Do not settle for the first person who buys you dinner or for the person who says you look pretty, do not settle for the one who does not share your dreams but laughs at your jokes. Do not settle for attraction without depth, or good conversation with no intent to stay. Do not settle for charm when they do not value what you value, do not settle for convenience without love. Do not settle for a candle when you were taught to love the sun, do not settle because of time when you know that love is patient. Do not settle, please do not settle because there is someone out there who refuses to settle, and you are worth so much more than convenience and ease, you are worth a heart that fights for you.” T.B. LaBerge // Do Not Settle
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“Note to self: Don’t seek to be relevant, or liked, seek to be undeniable. Seek to be compassionate. Seek integrity. Seek humility. Seek Light.”
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“We need people in our lives with whom we can be as open as possible. To have real conversations with people may seem like such a simple, obvious suggestion, but it involves courage and risk.” Thomas Moore
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“But occasionally, love would cut in and open a door. It grew my heart. It embraced me in.
Love sees a greatness in someone who cannot see it in themselves.
Love keeps no record of wrongs. It hopes in all things, it does not rejoice in evil. It perseveres.” J.S. Park
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“Freedom and love go together. Love is not a reaction. If I love you because you love me, that is mere trade, a thing to be bought in the market; it is not love. To love is not to ask anything in return, not even to feel that you are giving something- and it is only such love that can know freedom.” Jiddu Krishnamurti
“Like a wild flower; she spent her days, allowing herself to grow, not many knew of her struggle, but eventually all; knew of her light.” Nikki Rowe
By: Gabriela Yareliz
The past few days have been filled with flowers, sunshine, computer screens, notebooks, friends– a whirlwind. Bar studying and other tensions have taken a front seat. And while life’s normal stresses linger, things are exciting and emotionally charged.
Bar prep has us like:
Studying and lectures:
Motivation for us all to enjoy the journey:
The weather is beautiful:
“I need Christ, not something that resembles Him.” C.S. Lewis
Happy Memorial Day weekend. Of course, on a day like today we remember those who have died while serving our great country. It’s also a day filled with BBQs, food, family and relaxing (something we can do because of those the day honors).
I hope my U.S. readers had a lovely and relaxing long weekend. And for those of you not in the U.S., I hope you had an inspiring and fun Monday back in the grind.
New York is hot, sticky and noisy. We are all out and about, children dancing in park fountains and dogs dragging their owners down the congested sidewalks. Winter has finally retreated, I think. I hope. Let’s just declare it as so.
My weekend was filled with good conversation. That is rare and always a treat.
“To me, a man is someone who is brave enough to love, and let himself be loved.” Louis Sachar, Small Steps
[How bar review days are spent:]
“You will never know the fullness of Christ until you know the emptiness of everything else but Christ.” Charles Spurgeon
“The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair, and though in all lands love is now mingled with grief, it grows perhaps the greater.” J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
“No star stops burning in the sky because it isn’t a planet, it does what it needs to do, so must you. So be, and continue to be, until you realize what that truly means because when you see what you really are, you start to see life differently. You were never meant to compete with those around you, you were meant to live life in a way that invites others to join you in this journey.” T.B. LaBerge // Go Now
[Kendall Jenner @Cannes2015]
“When I saw you, I knew my one day was today, and every day to come.” T.B. LaBerge // My One Day is Today
Greetings. I should be studying or sleeping. One of the two. Instead, I am here. The mind has been on a constant study roll. It’s incredible. My mind is like a giant pitcher with a bunch of Kool-Aid sloshing around. With the smiley face on it… Yeah, keep the smiley.
The days are filled with more appointments and responsibilities than I could possibly fit into a set of 24 hours. I guess that is what makes my life consistently interesting. So, life is interesting. I ended my flirtation with one type of social media. I’ve discovered that once I am over it, I am over it. One can’t really force oneself to be into something if one isn’t… so that ended. I hate that stupid social pressure that comes along with it, and the etiquette that tends to control people’s lives– it is just boring.
Control. It is something I don’t like about a lot of new technology, and also about certain people. Some people need to learn their place in life. There are people who try to impose themselves on others. People try to manipulate others with what they think are subtle tactics, but they are not subtle at all. It’s disturbing. Please take your manipulation and insecurities elsewhere.
People will say things, and mentally, it’s like:
Then, you must audibly respond with:
And then, at the end of the conversation, when he or she realizes he or she can’t control the situation:
Bar prep has begun. Oh the joys. We are all reliving our first year of law school. It’s glorious. We are reciting scandalous hypotheticals, reviewing legal concepts and praying a man who is not as promiscuous as George Clooney (but just as handsome) finds us. Bar prep will have control over a lot of us for months, whether we like it or not.
I am very observant. And through observation, I learned that a quote by Marisa de los Santos has some truth to it; she says, “I don’t think love is blind, but wanting to be in love, that’s probably blind.” I saw that in full color this week. Sometimes, that desire to be loved makes people forget their worth and what they really want in their lives. Sometimes, it leads people to want to control, or allow others to control their circumstances.
Hmm… The things we do, say, and try.
The biggest lesson of all is that we are all independent agents who choose. You can’t force someone to like you; you can’t force someone to respond to you; you can’t force someone to value you; you can’t force someone to love you; and you can’t control people. Letting go is really for the best.
People need space. Many times, people make up their minds about relationship issues before they even think they have their minds made up, and they show it in their actions and attitudes. And if they don’t have their minds made up, an act of manipulation can change things and make up their mind, quick.
People don’t own each other. They don’t; and they shouldn’t.
I think you can seldom respect something you can manipulate in every which way.
It’s time to get that Monday positivity up. Our to-do lists are as full as they are going to be this week (I hope), and things will be crossed off (and hopefully not added) as the week progresses. In life, we continue to grow and progress, and after one hurdle is conquered, another appears on the horizon. It’s like a snowball rolling… it gets bigger; pieces may break off; it keeps rolling; it gets bigger; and eventually, maybe it even builds something… I guess, the key is to not get overwhelmed. We must sit back and gain perspective; we adjust our belts; prepare our strategy and our mind set.
Take this as a moment to relax; a moment to recalibrate focus, and a moment to gain perspective, to dream, and to rise to the occasion.
Remember why you are where you are standing, and remember where you are going.
It’s Monday; let’s rock.
“Remember, you’re called to be like Christ, not like other Christians.”
“Oddly enough, it’s the storms that whisper His name, the storms that make His presence most known. So prepare yourself when the seas of life begin to grow restless because you might be getting ready to encounter God, and what a heartbreakingly beautiful thing it is to behold.”
T.B. LaBerge // Go Now
“Goodnight and great love to you. We see the same stars.”
George Mallory, from a letter to his wife Ruth during the 1921 Everest Reconnaissance Expedition
“If we are going to heal, we must find something meaningful that came to us because of our tragedies.”
Donald Miller
“God is never as nervous about our future, or as concerned about our past, as we are.”
Bob Goff
“I learn a good deal by merely observing you, And letting you talk as long as you please, And taking note of what you do not say.”
It’s exam season in law school. The final days countdown. Oh, law school. You can meet noble people, strange people, catty people, self-centered people (the world in one building, minus the racial diversity)– and it is often said that all attorneys have some kind of ego complex. Not sure if that is accurate. Maybe it is (not all attorneys are Harvey Specter, however). It’s an interesting work environment when you work side-by-side, consistently close with people. It can be cliqueish and very reminiscent of high school drama, at times. You become a family, though. A weird family. I guess it’s like that everywhere. No matter what the career or location. It’s a human thing. Law school is coming to an end, but everything else is beginning.
So, here I am. Before endings and beginnings commence, I am distracting myself a little. Pressing pause. I hope you find some inspiration here, too.
I am ready for summer. I stayed up last night until 3 a.m. today. Keeping it real. I want summer. I am thinking family, lemonade, Sarah Dessen books, sunshine, bar prep books, gluten-free bagels… it’s looking good.
“We loved with a love that was more than love.”
Edgar Allan Poe
“‘I am with you always’ is enough for my soul to live upon no matter who forsakes me.” Charles Spurgeon
“The sun does not demand a plant to grow more quickly than it should, it simply shines and allows the plant to soak in the rays that it gives. So should our love be, never forcing but always radiating, allowing growth to happen in time.” T.B. LaBerge // I like you and I miss you
Loving this new Becky G song. It’s making me dream of summertime.
GABRIELA YARELIZ 