GABRIELA YARELIZ

By: Gabriela Yareliz

As we are deep in the hockey playoffs— there are some general things we have to talk about.

ESPN You are DESTROYING Women On-Air Talent

First, can we just all agree that it’s hard to be a woman in sports journalism? When I took the class, it was me and like one other girl. (And I am not a sports journalist). So you know that the women who report on the NHL worked hard to be there. Emily Kaplan is a favorite. She always says ‘thank you’ to players in their native language (cute). But let me tell you something, ESPN must be going through budget cuts because their on-camera talent is looking like they do their own styling, hair and makeup. I have seen the women wear completely unflattering colors and outfits. Cheap purples that clash with both playing team’s colors, etc. I have seen their hair literally so wildly out of place and sticking up. I have seen their makeup messy and smudged. They deserve better. Even MSG Networks, a smaller local (NY) network, has talent that looks professionally put together.

The women on ESPN have looked so disheveled (and they are beautiful women), I have actively questioned if they are being sabotaged by the network. Do better ESPN.

Where are the Real Questions?

Next, I have been disappointed by journalist questions in general. They ask the most generic questions over and over again. The players, even the most polite, end up looking annoyed because they are in fact wasting their time. They answer the same questions 20x. I have heard the weirdest questions that often sound like a backhanded compliment. It has like a weird little insult mixed in. “You, of all people, scored this goal after not scoring for five games…” “Isn’t it hard to believe, after a season like the one you had, that you are here? How does it feel?” And it’s not that we can’t be factual— it’s the tone in which the questions are asked. It sounds catty and like a dig. It isn’t said in a matter-a-fact way. I have been surprised certain players haven’t just walked off mid-interview as they stand there in skates, covered in sweat. The coach interviews can be painful unless you have a coach that inserts humor and banter, because it’s the same questions on repeat. People don’t ask hard questions. The ones we actually want answered.

Do you know how many times I have heard a journalist ask a Panthers player what they learned about Brad Marchand when he joined the team? I have heard that question at least 64 times. And it’s always the same answer. You are telling me there is nothing else you can ask a Stanley Cup winning team? As a common objection in court says, “Asked and answered. Move on.”

Slow Down the Anthems

If a U.S. team is playing in Canada, they sing both national anthems. Naturally. What I have noticed is that the home team will sing their country’s national anthem at a regular tempo. It’s all very nice. The other country gets screwed.

So, during the home Maple Leafs’ games, they sang the Canadian anthem nicely. Then, they sang the U.S. anthem at 2x speed like a podcast I am trying to cram on my commute walk. I have never heard a faster U.S. National Anthem singing. It’s bizarre. I think part of the respect we should have for another country is to not race through their national anthem like it’s a rap remix. Sing it normal. Include the natural emotional pauses and inflections. We need to normalize singing both national anthems at the same speed. Otherwise, it’s just unhinged.

One Wish

Ok, ok, I am done. If I only get one of these wishes, someone please save the ESPN female talent. So that even if the questions don’t improve and the anthems are done in -6 seconds, at least we don’t have to feel a pang of sadness as we stare at the hard working female journalist who is trying to get us the tea behind the bench.

Thank you.