An Overlooked Blessing

“I’m grateful that Heaven operates on a ‘need to know’ basis. It’s one of life’s most overlooked blessings.” Sarah Ban Breathnach

By: Gabriela Yareliz

When life squeezes us and wrings us like an old cleaning rag, we often wish we could have seen whatever we are going through ahead of time. Usually, our wish to have a glimpse into the future only relates to the difficult or hard moments. We wonder if we would be more prepared or act differently. And listen, sometimes, we wish we knew the good times ahead, too.

I was talking about this with someone close to me, recently. This idea of ‘what if we knew what was coming?’ Maybe, knowing would make us wish we didn’t know. Maybe it would be too difficult. We often feel overwhelmed by a snapshot moment— imagine having the whole panoramic view?! Yikes. At times, we are given the strength to endure and overcome when we meet the moment.

Erwin McManus recently spoke on James 1:2-4; the idea that a trial is when God meets us in our moment.

We are given our daily bread— we are fed and given provision for the moment. I think Sarah Ban Breathnach is right. Our limited information as we go along, if we look at it closely, is often deep grace for our finite weary little souls. “One of life’s most overlooked blessings,” indeed.

The Seasonal Shift

“We put all this pressure on ourselves after watching movies where a girl moves to New York at the age of twenty-three and somehow has a job that you could only get if you have fifteen years of work experience. She lives in an apartment you could only get if you were a literal millionaire.” Tinx

Pinterest

By: Gabriela Yareliz

The pressure we put on ourselves is real. Timeline pressures; all kinds of pressures. We are so silly to, at times, focus on what we haven’t achieved yet versus taking the time to celebrate what we have achieved thus far, all that we have built. I am reflecting a lot on my own journey as I am reaching a decade out of law school.

September is one of my favorite coaching months because the focus is on creating a ‘house of joy.’ This focus has me reflecting a lot on gratitude.

It’s a time of seasonal cleaning and reflection on how to create a space of connection and warmth. A space of gratitude.

Little by little, as we walk forward in gratitude, every morning, we are grateful for what we have, even if it’s not exactly what our unrealistic childhood timeline had projected.

The warm bed we wake up in. The little corner of the couch where our spouse likes to sit. The small window by the table. Our stack of books by the bed.

Don’t minimize the ordinary and the things you already have. They are not ordinary at all.

What are you grateful for? How will you create a ‘house of joy’ this season?

Tunnel to Towers

Image of Stephen Siller

By: Gabriela Yareliz

When you see an officer on the news who is injured or killed in line of duty, or soldiers/veterans come back with amputations— what you often don’t hear about is that Tunnel to Towers steps in and provides a mortgage free home for our first responders and heroes. For disabled veterans and first responders, they have provided smart homes that help with mobility and everyday life. For the families left after a hero’s death, they provide a home and support.

Today, I write asking you to support my fifth 5K with the Tunnel to Towers Foundation by donating here.

“Born from the tragedy of 9/11, the Tunnel to Towers Foundation carries forward a legacy of courage and heroism. Built upon the mantra, ‘While we have time, LET US DO GOOD,’ the Foundation supports our nation’s fallen and catastrophically injured first responders, military heroes and their families.” (Source: Tunnel to Towers website)

The T2T 5K is an emotional day where we trace Stephen Siller’s steps. Siller, a firefighter FDNY Squad 1, saw what was happening the morning of 9/11 from Red Hook, Brooklyn, and he put on his gear. There was no way into Manhattan except through the Brooklyn-Battery Tunnel. He ran through the tunnel to ground zero, where he gave his life. Tunnel to Towers honors those who see disaster and run toward it— the heroes.

Help us honor our heroes and those who continue to run into harms way doing good.

“Please help me support the Tunnel to Towers Foundation and America’s heroes by making a donation through my page. The process is fast, easy and secure. Thank you for your support, and please don’t forget to send this page to anyone who may be interested in donating!”

If you are moved to donate and want to be a part of this ongoing mission— donate here.

Forgiveness

“Children begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them; sometimes, they forgive them.” Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

By: Gabriela Yareliz

You know what a fun nostalgic watch is for me? Just Shoot Me!

Nina Van Horn is forever an icon. I have been rewatching with my husband in chronological order, and recently, we came across an episode that I really like. Jack Gallo wonders if it’s a bad thing he wants his child bride Allie back after she cheated on him. Maya, his daughter who was a classmate of her father’s wife (which makes her line “Stepmother,” all the more hilarious earlier in the episode), asks him if he can forgive her. Maya remembers how betrayed she felt when her father cheated on her mom and left them. She tells Jack, “I forgave you.” Jack asks her why, and Maya says something along the lines of, “Sometimes you need to forgive people because you want them to be in your life.”

In an over-therapied society, we judge harshly, and sometimes, engage in parent-blaming. It’s commonplace, nowadays. You go to a forum, and you ask a young adult why they are where they are in life, and they blame their parents. A recipe for disaster. A sissy move.

Here is the PSA that your life is your responsibility no matter what your parents did (or didn’t do) or who they were/are. In adulthood, you become who you choose to be.

As you get older, you realize how hard it is to grow in life. Like true soul growth. And if you have compassion, you learn to accept people for who they are. It doesn’t justify them or mean they are right, it just means you don’t hold people to an expectation they can’t meet. You forgive them. You realize it’s not about you, and all about where they are. You forgive yourself. You realize you won’t be the perfect parent or human either.

Because realizing that your parents are just regular, f***ed-up people is an essential part of learning who you really are. Tinx, The Shift

I think we should strive more to see the silver linings. We should strive to remember what our parents did right. How they have supported us. And if they did little that is right, then you have to decide— as Maya Gallo said— if you want them in your life, then, you forgive them. Don’t be one of those people who harbors resentments that taint your relationships every day.

Forgive your parents

My favorite feature

Elena Brower, Softening Time

Forgiveness becomes such a key to life. It’s the next level. It’s the allowance to make mistakes, even the ones that change everything. It’s an acceptance of risk— the risk that comes attached to any kind of love.

“A Culture in Turmoil”

“Charlie Kirk was a human being.

He was a dad and a father.

His wife is now a widow.

His two children, because of how young they are, will not have a personal memory of their dad.

That’s been stolen from them by someone who thought they had the right to kill another human being.

And this is a political assassination.

But more than that, to me, it is an ideological assassination.

A profound cultural statement of, ‘If you believe this, you are not safe.”

We need to reset and establish a cultural foundation of, “You’re allowed to speak your mind.

You are not evil because you disagree with me, and I’m not evil because I disagree with you.’”

Erwin McManus

Overwhelmed with Darkness

By: Gabriela Yareliz

Our hearts are so heavy with grief, we don’t know where to look.

Spiritually, you feel the darkness. I am tired of seeing Christian children killed in worship and going to school. I am tired of seeing law-abiding citizens get killed and criminals turned loose and defended. I am tired of the political violence that has brought us here— where Charlie Kirk was assassinated in cold blood yesterday in front of us. There was the elderly couple in Queens who did a good deed, invited someone into their home, and were murdered. The young woman in North Carolina killed by a man with a collection of mug shots.

When does this end? When does leadership protect its law-abiding citizens instead of protecting those who do harm? And no… this is not about guns. The irony is the party that is anti-gun is terrorizing and killing innocent people with it. And where there is no gun, someone gets stabbed. This is about character. It’s about evil. It’s about the nation’s justification for evil.

Our freedoms are eroding. Darkness lurks at every corner and is given free rein. We do not have the freedom to worship, to live freely, to speak our conscience, to do good. Evil is called good. And good is hated.

As seen yesterday, you can invite someone to debate, and you pay for it with your life.

The person who told me Charlie Kirk was shot yesterday said it with almost a thrill. It was so disturbing, I didn’t think it was real.

Will leadership simply continue to erode our freedoms with more surveillance in the scheme of protecting those who terrorize us with violence? Or will there be accountability?

Isn’t that the whole point of our legal system? To give just consequences to those who harm— no matter the race, gender, political affiliation? How are we equal under the law without justice?

And here we are on September 11. It has been a dark set of weeks, and only getting darker for our country. We remember an attack on our freedoms and way of life. We remember the failed leadership that flourished after this day on 2001 under that President. We remember that with each act of violence, we lose more than people. Our freedoms keep being eroded in the midst of our grief.

There are people who hate what is good, pure, free and righteous. We cannot let them win.

We must retain our humanity. We must retain our freedom. We were born free. If we lose that, we lose it all.

Today, we remember all who have passed due to violence and attacks. Our hearts are heavy. We also remember that good and freedom are worth fighting for.

We remember. 🙏🏼

Nostalgia Menu

Image via The Daily Dot

By: Gabriela Yareliz

I was listening to Andy Frisella remember the 7/11 Big Grab Dorito bags. (Apparently, the 7/11 social media is fire, and it’s a bunch of cars). The store carries Frisella’s 1st Phorm Energy. While they carry new products, they are a treasure chest for nostalgic snacks.

Taco Bell’s Y2K Decades Menu has returned. It also has nostalgic merch. It’s brilliant.

Nostalgia is something everyone loves.

The food maybe was killing us, but it’s not about the foods— it’s about the memories attached to it. The stories.

I remember rolling through that drive thru for a bean burrito. Bless.

I saw the commercial, and the memories came flooding back. If they bring back the chihuahua— that’ll be a whole different story.

A nostalgia menu for me would probably include mac and cheese from a Velveeta box, SPAM with rice, Jell-o fruit cups, Vienna Sausages, McDonalds cheeseburger, a bean burrito, a pan crust pizza from Pizza Hut, and Ritz crackers dipped in Abuelita’s hot chocolate.

Is there a place that brings back memories?What’s on your nostalgia menu?