If you have had significant trauma, guard against triggering things (like documentaries on traumatic and dark events). You should be in the process of rewiring your brain to feel safe and normalize joy and peace rather than chaos and darkness (which you are used to).
Many people go years feeling something is wrong or off, and they never ask or confront out of fear. Never be a person who is afraid to ask or discuss rational conclusions. Seeking clarity is never a bad thing.
Not every difficult conversation gets a resolution. Sometimes, they are moments of expression and clarity and building blocks for the future, if both relationally allow it.
Your sadness, moodiness, hopelessness isn’t part of your personality. It’s how you have wired your brain based on thought patterns, habit and frequency of occurrence. You can rewire your brain and personality and practice feeling a certain way until it becomes your new normal. You can change at any time.
Acknowledge hard things. It’s a fine line between minimizing something and disregarding yourself and martyrdom. Don’t be a martyr. Acknowledge what is hard.
Observe, don’t absorb.
People are responsible for themselves. You are responsible for you.
It’s officially autumn!!! (Yes, that deserves three exclamation points). Man, I love this season.
The mornings are dark and glowy. It’s raining as I type this, and I am playing an “Autumn Jazz” playlist. The diffuser is going with all the yummy oils. The only word that comes to mind is “glow.”
I am grateful my family and friends are safe after Hurricane Helene. My heart always hurts when I see places I love, rocked. (I LOVE YOU, FLORIDA). If people are made of places, as Elizabeth Brewster says, I am made of you, Florida. Praying for all affected on the East Coast. The devastation is real. Our government should be doing more in response to the loss and chaos.
I was discussing my word of the year with my mom this month– that word is “miracle.” I didn’t understand why, but it was the word that came to me. I read an entry from Marianne Williamson’s book A Year Of Miracles every morning, but aside from that, I saw no relevance– until this month. This month, I did.
I saw God intervene in an incredible way in a situation I had been praying about (and miserable in) for months. God is always right on time. I can’t go too in the weeds, but I tell you this to encourage you in case you are waiting for your own miracle. God is near.
What did I do this month? I put up a fall garland. Brought out some velvet textures in tablecloth. On 9/11, I nervously took the train and remembered this day in 2001. When I arrived to the office, I closed my office door and cried. In the evening, my husband got us tickets to see Elizabeth Strout, one of our favorite writers. She was all-together lovely. I left inspired. I want to be her friend. (In my head, we are besties). We drove through Tribeca and saw the twin tower lights.
Later in the month, I saw Erwin McManus and Aaron McManus do a live recording of the Mind Shift Podcast. (The podcast is below among the YouTube videos, if you are interested). It was a blessed evening. I got a cute Mosaic NYC hat (and it’s white. My nonpractical self came out when my husband asked me which hat I would like. He is always sweet like that).
We visited the Madewell Denim Atelier for treats. My husband got me a cloche that had caught my eye. We walked around like crazy.
We saw a Sinatra-type concert at the San Gennaro festival that filled my heart with so much joy. Music then was something else.
I finished the book The Perfect Couple (now a Netflix movie). It was the best Elin Hilderbrand book so far. A great summer read to close out the summer with 39 books read in 2024 (so far).
I started lifting more weights and modifying workouts. I wrote about it here, in the only post of the month. More to come on that journey.
It was a month of interesting news: Eating the dogs and cats, the ABC debate whistleblower, Olivia Nuzzi’s nudes and RFK “chased by porn”, they conveniently and finally decided to see Eric Adam’s corruption, Sean “Diddy” Combs is in prison, they tried to kill Trump again, Lana Del Rey married her alligator tour guide… You can’t say September was boring.
I have some serious seasonal decluttering to do.
Here we are. Autumn, we are here for you and all you might bring. (Jazz plays in the background).
Quotes
“Beware, for I am fearless, and therefore, powerful.” Mary Shelley
“Discipline is nothing but self-respect at the highest level.” Unknown
“Sir, my concern is not whether God is on our side; my greatest concern is to be on God’s side, for God is always right.” Abraham Lincoln
“A leader is a dealer of hope.” Jon Gordon
“Smart people learn from everything and everyone. Average people from their experiences. Stupid people already have all the answers.” Socrates
“The truth, however, ugly in itself, is always curious and beautiful to seekers after it.” Agatha Christie
“You are worth a full night of sleep. You are worth a good walk outside. You are worth being loved and loving others. You are worth being content at work. You are worth pursuing joy. Please don’t give up on yourself. You are worth your full attention.” Dr. John Delony
“Generations are impacted when a woman lives with hope in her hands.” Kristi McLelland
“In life, you must be a warrior, and war requires realism. While others may find beauty in endless dreams, warriors find it in reality, in awareness of limits, in making the most of what they have.” Robert Greene
“There is no such thing as lying, or theft, or fraud, and so on, because everything, everything is seen and accounted for and known. Everything one does is inscribed in this record of one’s life, a record that then affects oneself, one’s conditions, the music one makes for oneself, one’s family, the world.” Naomi Wolf
“People find healing in places where they are heard, not gaslit. Seen, not ignored. Loved, not shamed. These are the deepest medicines.” Dr. Will Cole
“Somewhere in the world there is a defeat for everyone. Some are destroyed by defeat, and some made small and mean by victory. Greatness lives in one who triumphs equally over defeat and victory.” John Steinbeck
Have you ever wondered what the truth is? Have you ever wanted to go back to high school?
As we continue to educate ourselves in all things wellness, it can be frustrating. The amount of contradictory information you can find is overwhelming. I run little experiments on myself for three months at a time to see how I feel. Here is some stuff that dawned on me, recently.
I have exercised my whole life. There has never been a time where I wasn’t active. After law school, I switched over to low-impact workouts from whatever the hell I was doing before (so many things, guys). It has been good to not have so much cortisol from other types of workouts. HIIT was killing me slowly. But then enter the plain old fact that your body won’t reach a certain definition with just yoga or pilates unless you have the genetics for it. (I do not. I am petite, but strong. I am not dainty.) Doing the British girl pilates is not gonna have me looking like the girl. It’s impossible. One of my thighs is bigger than both of hers. I am Puerto Rican after all.
Pilates won’t cut it. I heard this in a podcast with Dr. Shannon Ritchy (founder of Evlo Fitness), and deep inside, I knew she was telling the truth. I have experienced it myself. My body doesn’t look the same as it used to (counting the age factor, which makes that normal). When I was listening to her, it felt like someone was saying something that has been churning in my head for about a two years.
Pilates is amazing for endurance and resistance training (and flexibility and balance), but it won’t give you the lean muscle structure that really toned women have.
When I look at the women who have the body composition and strength I would like to have, they all weightlift. (See Tulsi Gabbard). So, flashbacks to high school weightlifting class– I’m going all in.
Image via Twitter. Tulsi being a boss.
Then, there was the “war on oatmeal.” Guys, I ate oatmeal for breakfast every day for like a decade (probably longer). I love oatmeal. Then came the journals saying it causes glucose spikes and the glyphosate spraying. I started eating eggs or having smoothies. There are mornings I just intermittent fast. I have felt so disoriented around breakfast for the past four years. There are only so many eggs you can have.
On May 7, 2024, I received a newsletter from Arnold Schwarzenegger (yes, I love his newsletter), talking about oatmeal. It discussed a study that was misinterpreted and later reviewed by Dr. Idrees Mughal. Dr. Mughal concluded:
“The researchers found that switching between eggs and oatmeal didn’t change weight, body fat, cholesterol, HbA1c, or the primary markers of inflammation. In other words, eating oatmeal was just as good for your heart as eggs.“
“Most research has found that eating oats is associated with lower heart disease, lower cholesterol, lower body weight, and better overall health. In fact, one review of 21 randomized controlled trials found that oatmeal reduces inflammation, and another study found that it reduces blood sugar in type-2 diabetics.”
I was also reading in Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) that many issues we women have hormonally and with menstruation are attributable to liver qi stagnation. While I don’t care about qi, I do think there is something to imbalances in the body. When I was looking at what they recommend, they recommend warm morning meals (like oatmeal and porridge) and warm drinks. No iced drinks, smoothies, etc.
So, I found some glyphosate-free oats from a source that does toxin checks, and I am going back to warm porridge mornings. I am experimenting to see how I feel. (Not gonna lie, I am a bit giddy).
It’s interesting when we have full-circle moments with more knowledge. It’s also encouraging to think that sometimes, what our body craves for us intuitively is what is actually right for us, and it’s unique to every person as an individual.
So, as the days grow darker and colder, your girl is going to be out here eating oatmeal in the mornings and lifting her weights. I think I am finally on the path that will take me to where I want to go. A path that looks a lot like my mornings in high school, ironically.
What is life, if not an endless pursuit of curiosity and trying the new and old? Feeling nostalgic…
August rushed off. What does this mean? The month was a bit of a blur. It was filled with busy stuff at work, back-to-school, smoothies, sweaty walks around Central Park where I was offered a carriage ride almost every day, a tow truck ride with a really nice guy who can back up that tow truck like it’s nobody’s business and funerals.
It’s just about that time where I start itching for autumn. I am done with the sweating and summer clothes. Tired of the AC dry eyes (but thank God for the AC). It’s just time. I will admit I didn’t spend as much time on a project I am working on as I should have, but I still made some headway. Did some pilates challenges. I look the same.
Entered my essential oils era, and felt like a little witch or scientist pouring and combining them into a glass bottle through a funnel. I read a lot on the train. Tried at least three new recipes, but cooked very little. I am very into the marinara sauce a local Italian place makes, but they had none on Friday.
It’s that time of the year where I just want to wear leopard print and cozy sweaters (this is a mood I enter into, even though I own very little leopard print). Here we are, wishing away summer.
I sort of wished we had gone to a county fair this summer, but it feels odd to go to a fair when there is a lot of grief and other stuff going on. Just not right. The timing was just off. Maybe next year. I went to a Kohls (after years of not going) and got the cutest purse.
It was a stressful month. You know those types of months– the ones that get you dizzy and almost give you a panic attack-type month. But we made it through. We always do. Learned a lot about “resetting” oneself.
I don’t know why, but a story that came back to me this month was an experience I had in law school– bear with me.
I was a nervous one toward the end of law school. I was hustling like you wouldn’t believe. I needed to make sure I had a job lined up before graduation. I needed to have a way to pay bills and live, you know. There was only Plan A. Your girl was going hard. I was applying to like 15 jobs a day.
I had done a lot of immigration clinical work, and there was this very sophisticated woman who had a nonprofit down south. At that point, I wanted to come back home, so I applied, and she invited me to have a coffee with her. I don’t remember how I was connected with this woman, but I do remember one of the girls in my employment law class was engaged to her son. They were a well-to-do family, and I had heard rumors of how hard she was working to be accepted by this family and her future mother-in-law.
I remember we met in a small cafe close to Columbia on the Upper West Side. She walked in perfumed. Heels on. Scarf around her neck and her blonde hair flowing. There are people you just see the money on them. She was glistening.
I will never forget that conversation. It was sort of like an interview. I sat there nervously in my black blazer, which had been my mom’s, drinking my tea. She talked about the job. It was working with migrant farmworkers. I needed to have a car, and be out there 24/7. There was danger of being covered in chemicals. There was monitoring of corporate entities that sold from these farms. You were on-call basically 24/7. I nodded along as she listed many job duties. The salary had not been listed in the job description. When it came time to talk about compensation, (I was in suspense), I was shocked when she dropped the salary. It was like $27,000 a year; for me, she said, she would bump it to $32,000, as if she was doing me this incredible favor. It was like selling your soul for nothing. How did this woman expect me to pay for housing, the car she said I was required to have, insurance, my student loan, all of it. I think what stung the most was knowing how wealthy this family was and that they were very involved in this. This job that required so much was something they weren’t willing to compensate for. I almost fell out of my chair.
I remember walking out that day in disbelief, feeling I had wasted my time and had not been valued. I remember hearing more horror stories about this family throughout my last semester, and staring into the back of my classmate’s head (the one that was going to marry into this family), thinking, That poor girl. She is going to be in for it. It was almost like I was trying to tell her through telepathy. Part of me felt like she knew.
Maybe, it’s the fact that I am nearing my decade out of law school, or the fact that I find myself in the Upper West Side a lot, but that story came back to me this month, and I was grateful. Grateful for all that has been and all that never was.
There is an intimacy that comes in being valued and being understood. I have been doing a lot of coaching around that. A lot of intimacy with oneself, too. There have been many instances in life where I felt I had to explain so much or bend myself to be understood. This was not one of them. I simply said ‘no’ and walked away. I’ve had many instances in life where I didn’t and tried harder.
I once listened to someone else get coached, and the coach said, “Okay, so this person is committed to devaluing you and misunderstanding you. They don’t know who you are. Do you? Do you know what you are worth?” There was a long silence. That stayed with me.
In my head, I went into full Charlotte York mode:
Autumn is a season where a lot goes to die. We have autumns in life, too. But remember, it is just a season. I hope that this upcoming month, you say “no” to what deserves a “no”. To any offer or idea that is insulting. I hope you say “yes” to valuing yourself as you should. Remember that autumn teaches us to slow down and rest; you trust in what is to come. Winter then comes, and then, spring. If you are going through grief and difficulty, while some things remain, this is a season of many. It may be a life-altering one, but summer is coming once again. No two summers are the same, but they are summers. We just have to get through the deaths and re-births that get us there.
Be grateful for what has been and for all that will never be.
Remember, you are worth a million.
The post of the month was ironically the July 2024 Favorites. I read some good books, among them was Women Who Work by Ivanka Trump. The book is like a collection of Stephen Covey quotes, and yes, down below are some of my favorites. I also couldn’t help myself.
Quotes
“Learning is a gift, even when pain is your teacher!” Michael Jordan
“Life is higher education, and we never stop learning from the courses we take without ever having signed up to take them.” Tyler Knott Gregson
“To experience time travel, read. To achieve immortality, write.” James Clear
“Without courage, wisdom bears no fruit.” Baltasar Gracián
“Progress is being aware when there is a storm happening inside of you and remaining calm as it passes by.” Yung Pueblo
“You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was Dostoevsky and Dickens who taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, or who ever had been alive. Only if we face these open wounds in ourselves can we understand them in other people. An artist is a sort of emotional or spiritual historian. His role is to make you realize the doom and glory of knowing who you are and what you are.” James Baldwin
“Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out.” John Wooden.
“There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, air-less—it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.” C.S. Lewis
“People are watching. You are either leading people to be better or you are leading people to be worse. Even if you are someone who is struggling in life, there are still people in your life that look up to you for leadership. Fight. Push through. Show them the way. Be the example you wish you had. Be the leader you wish you had. Be the teacher you wish you had. Be the parent you wish you had. Be the friend you wish you had. This is what changes the world.” Andy Frisella
“The moment was all; the moment was enough.” Virginia Woolf
“Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect.” Margaret Mitchell
“That’s one of the reasons my boobs are so big: it’s just all heart pushin’ out of my chest.” Dolly Parton
“When I choose to see the good side of things, I’m not being naive. It is strategic and necessary. It’s how I’ve learned to survive through everything.” Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)
“I’ve experienced His presence in the deepest darkest hell that men can create. I have tested the promises of the Bible, and believe me, you can count on them.” Corrie Ten Boom
“If family comes first, work does not come second. Life comes together.” Anne-Marie Slaughter
“Mentally strong people don’t do nice things for people who don’t treat them with respect.” Dr. Amen
“Being calm about everything allows your mind to find solutions. Calmness is also a state of trust. Instead of overthinking and overreacting, you just surrender for that moment and allow yourself to receive guidance for what doesn’t make sense.” Unknown
“Someone who had a childhood of chronic chaos may not even know they are traumatized because it wasn’t one major event, it was their every day, just because something is common doesn’t make it normal.” Dr. Will Cole
“Your life doesn’t just ‘happen’. Whether you know it or not, it is carefully designed by you. The choices after all, are yours. You choose happiness. You choose sadness. You choose decisiveness. You choose ambivalence. You choose success. You choose failure. You choose courage. You choose fear. Just remember that every moment, every situation, provides a new choice.” Stephen Covey
“It’s way easier to be negative, sarcastic, and cynical. It’s much harder to be hopeful, positive, and proactive.” Rainn Wilson
“Too many lives are wasted living in fear of what these insignificant people might have to say about you when you stumble.” Andy Frisella
“The proper way to fix the world isn’t to fix the world. There’s no reason to assume that you’re even up to such a task. But you can fix yourself. You’ll do no harm by doing so, and in that manner at least, you will make the world a better place.” Dr. Jordan B. Peterson
“No friend ever served me, and no enemy ever wronged me whom I have not repaid in full.” Lucius Cornelius Sulla
“The most courageous act is still to think for yourself, aloud.” Coco Chanel
“The key is not to prioritize what’s on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.” Stephen Covey
“It’s important to be willing to make mistakes. The worst thing that can happen is you become memorable.” Sara Blakely
“Wherever there is animal worship, there is human sacrifice.” G.K. Chesterton
“Mental toughness is knowing life isn’t fair and still playing to win.” Marcus Aurelius
“No one is coming to save you. You are the adult. I’m so sorry.” Dr. Jose Pharena
“Nobody is gonna hit you as hard as life, but it ain’t how hard you can hit. It’s how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. It’s how much you can take, and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.” Rocky Balboa
“Healing isn’t about fixing what’s broken– it’s about nourishing what’s been neglected.” Aviva Romm
“Trauma says, ‘I have to over-explain myself to be understood and accepted.’ Healing says, ‘I am learning to trust my own voice and be comfortable with being misunderstood. My value is not determined by other’s perception of me.'” Intelligent Change
“Live by three simple rules: Love needs action; trust needs proof; sorry needs change.” Naina Sanghvi
“Modern man is in a terrible predicament. He is helplessly enamored with the beauty of what the old world built, yet despises the beliefs that inspired them to build it.” Jeremy Tate
RFK Jr. addressed the nation today. Media is already not reporting accurately, so please watch it for yourself here on Rumble. I watched live, and some of the headlines are laughable. Other networks literally muted him as he spoke about censorship. You can’t make this up.
It was a moving speech. An important speech. As an independent, my respect for Bobby runs deep.
Loved @rooted.wings’ posts on this and others. We share this moment in history.
While I was watching live.
I want to see Bobby’s dream come true. It’s always a good day to end corruption, propaganda, big pharmaceutical control, and to fight for our children, country, health and freedom of speech. There is no freedom in communism or socialism.
Sometimes, life takes twists and turns that bring back emotions and thoughts that used to follow us around. We are triggered (for lack of a better word). We are like, this again?
It happens. We are human. Internal safety has been a concept I have been exploring through my coaching program (God bless our partners who sit and watch us while we drudge up all the childhood stuff and go through our emotions and processing— we hold space for each other). Internal safety has been a weakness of mine. I truly believe it is a human weakness (whether you acknowledge and work on it or not). This is why we act and react the way we do. Looking back, there were moments of a lot of uncertainty where I tried to control and calculate as a coping mechanism because of how out-of-control life felt.
I avoided a specific coaching teaching video on this topic, as one stupidly does with weaknesses. I listened to it recently (I relented. Its unwatched status was haunting me as someone who must clear every notification). It was eye-opening. I wanted to share this one insight for anyone who feels like life is filled with uncertainty, at the moment, or you feel like it’s déjà vu and you find yourself in a familiar circumstance or cycle.
There are times where things will have us being back in familiar thoughts or emotions. We will feel filled with fear. But, Dr. Edie always reminds us that we are people of love, not fear.
Recently, one thing that dawned on me as I imperfectly processed familiar unpleasant emotions and thoughts was that circumstances may be familiar (welcome back), but the difference is, while the circumstances may be familiar, you aren’t the same person. You are stronger, more resilient, you have a choice, and you are safe. You are in a metamorphosis.
This is something we have to keep coming back to. I hope this helps those processing the, at times, repeat unpleasantness of life, grief or loss.
Remember that you are a person of love. Remember God is with you. Remember that when life feels like a repeating nightmare track (and it does, sometimes, for all of us), you are not the same. You have everything you need. He is faithful.
Going down my rabbit holes. At one of our favorite places, Spring Aspen.
Hello!
Is it just me, or did July just FLY by? Suddenly, one Friday I found out it was time for Summer Stroll (think of Summer Stroll as a giant block party); My favorite vendor on the commercial avenue told me. The shock set in. Summer Stroll means summer is almost over, and my lease renews (I went to my very first Stroll the day I moved into my apartment– think of a tall Israeli realtor with a deep convincing voice being like, “Go. Meet your neighbors. It is nice.” As the social butterfly that I am, I went obediently).
Anyway– now, here we are in August. I am nearing the end of my Summer Fridays (sad!). How did I spend this one? Mostly debating whether a cheap airport blanket would catch fire if I popped it in the dryer. (I decided against it, and let it air dry). I cleaned, drafted some stuff for work, because even on a day off, I must. I listened to a coaching call. I wondered where the summer went. My mom, who is a teacher, starts school next week. My own job related to higher ed is prepping for the return of the students. My life will forever be marked by school years.
Today, I used the word “fab”. It reminded me of an old boss I had who would say that. She was the President and would stroll into board meetings with her freshly cleaned fur coat and talk about what a “fab” day it was. Ahh… fur coats. This heat wave that has us all sweating our life out on the train platforms has us all dreaming of coats.
This month, I ate amazing tacos. I went to the beach and actually liked it. It felt weirdly relaxing. Maybe also because I didn’t bring my phone. I completed the Fit as F*ck biohacking workout challenge modules. I am in week 6 of the Busy Girl Femme Nativa challenge. I am avoiding the easy workouts like weightless pilates and doing the hard reps with weights. It has felt good. Despite the fitness aspect feeling good, I haven’t felt my best this month in that I feel the detox from matcha has been brutal despite not having it every day. I tried mulberry leaf tea to replace matcha. It has a similar flavor and consistency and apparently has the added bonus of keeping blood sugar low. (I am a mulberry leaf girl now; I am declaring it). I ate something that gave me the worst food poisoning I have felt in recent time (I literally cried). I am feeling much better now.
As I was folding laundry, I was thinking about several things– how much better 2024 was than 2023. Last year was so brutal. I feel like I am still solidifying my footing from that year and healing from the stress wreck in my body. I was also wondering why I was so ragey in a conversation about presidential campaigns yesterday. I was expressing my concern. Why am I always concerned? I am so sick of politics, but I am concerned about people. Can this election just be done? I am terrified as to how smart or stupid Americans will prove themselves to be in this election cycle. Praying it is the former.
I thought about Fourth of July, and the amazing apple cider slushie I had. We saw Teddy Roosevelt’s newly returned watch at his estate. We saw a bunch of tiny crabs.
I need to read this book I got about him:
I read more “summer” books that I had on Kindle (I rarely read fiction). They haven’t been great. I gave them all one star. I was disappointed and reminded as to why I don’t read fiction.
I worked on my intermittent fasting this last month. I did terribly as far as going to bed early. I dreamed of autumn. I laughed with too many Theo Von videos.
Image by BvByG. Does anyone else’s daydreams look like this?
Below, you will find the best quotes and stuff from the month. I hope your July went by a bit slower. It’s a new month. It’s time to roll.
Quotes
“Against criticism we can neither protect nor defend ourselves; we must act in despite of it, and gradually, it resigns itself to this.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
“If you fail to say what you know to be true, you corrupt the world. You corrupt being. If you lie, you corrupt being. Corrupted being is hell, and if we all lie enough, then we have hell.” Dr. Jordan B. Peterson
“There is no loss too small to grieve. If you feel the loss, acknowledge it by grieving. Grief recognizes the void and invites God to fill it up with Himself.” Debra Fileta
“Most of the people you’re afraid of offending don’t give two f**** about offending you.” Andy Frisella
“The extraordinary hides within how we handle the ordinary.” Lisa Bevere
“Hope is a decision.” Dave Ramsey
“Everything may seem broken, but that was just as true when I was growing up in the 1970s and when my parents were growing up in the 1930s. It is the story of humanity.” Jonathan Haidt
“Do we really want to know who we are and break our reality?” Erwin McManus
“In Exodus, God tells Moses that the Israelites need to be free. There must be an association between Israel, the people who wrestle with God, and the idea of being called out of slavery. Interestingly enough, “Israel” does not mean those who “believe in God”; it means those who “wrestle with God.” That is what we do. We all wrestle with meaning, purpose, and significance. We wonder about the reality of ethical endeavor, and we are tormented by our consciences for not living up to our moral obligations. We shirk our responsibility — or do not. We wrestle with good and evil.” Dr. Jordan B. Peterson
“Good and evil both increase at compound interest. That is why the little decisions you and I make every day are of such infinite importance. The smallest good act today is the capture of a strategic point from which, a few months later, you may be able to go on victories you never dreamed of.” C.S. Lewis
“There are but two parties now: traitors and patriots. And I want hereafter to be ranked with the latter, and I trust, the stronger party.” Ulysses S. Grant
“Sometimes it’s not the people who change, it’s the mask that falls off.” Haruki Murakami
“The future isn’t about data, it’s about courage. The courageous will always prevail over the intelligent.” Erwin McManus
“I tore myself away from the safe comfort of certainties through my love for truth– and truth rewarded me.” Simone de Beauvoir
“People doing nothing have plenty to say about people doing something.” Andy Frisella
“You will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you.” Warren Buffet
“Your courage becomes offensive when other people realize that you are less afraid of the world than they think you should be.” Unknown
“The moment was all; the moment was enough.” Virginia Woolf
As I’ve expanded my learning in biohacking and self-experimentation for health, one thing has become a highlight. I have realized that for many health goals, whether it is lowering glucose, lowering stress, burning fat and/or balancing hormones, most of these things start with a question– “How can I make my body feel safe enough…?”
Often times, we don’t reach the milestones we propose for ourselves until we answer this question. The body and mind connection are an interesting thing. When was the last time you asked yourself this?
What is interesting is that I don’t think we are created to live safe lives, circumstantially speaking. No one in scripture lived in a safety bubble. Nothing is guaranteed in life. Life is pretty wild, chaotic and tragic. I mean, look around you. With things constantly spiraling into chaos and conflict– who feels safe? It becomes evident that safety and peace must be reached despite and independent of the circumstances.
In these strange times where people are behaving absolutely demonically (there is no other way to describe the evil we see and sense around us on the daily), I truly believe we need to pray more.
Prayer, while it doesn’t promise safety, it does guarantee resolve, wisdom, relationship, identity, resilience and the presence of the Almighty God. There is more power in these than in illusive “safety.”
God promises to “keep in perfect peace” he or she whose mind is focused and steadfast on Him. (Isaiah 26:3)
As we near tumultuous times where things will become more uncertain and volatile, we should be seeking healing. Only healed people can offer the world something better. God offers us wholeness and restoration. (1 Thess. 5:23) We must draw near to God, and He will come near to us. (James 4:8). We must purify our minds and remember that the world is a spiritual battle of good and evil. (Ephesians 6:12) Both defined by God, not our own opinions.
May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
The events of the past few months– actually days– need to be acknowledged. Every day, we collectively live out history. Listen, I tried to get something at the bank today and couldn’t because of the Microsoft system meltdown. People can’t get out of Milwaukee because of grounded flights. Every day is a new adventure. (Embrace it).
I come to you with my personal, unsolicited analysis as an independent, curious mind that has no main political party affiliation (and never has). That’s right, I am your self-appointed RNC-and-current-events analyst. I got some stuff to get off my chest.
The constant of life is change. Just as I have been changing, major players on the world stage have, too, and so have the major political parties. I write to you as someone who voted for Clinton in 2016 and was irritated that she didn’t win. (Now, I think she belongs in jail– but here we are). In the past, there were times where I had felt rejected by my own country, and at times, I wanted to reject it right back.
What we saw this week was a confirmation of a shift I’ve been banking on and observing over time. Listen, I am not my 2016 self and neither are you. (And if you are, that sucks. Grow a little). This isn’t your grandfather’s Republican or Democratic party. We are collectively guilty of elder abuse and have a senile man not running the country. (Having done elder law, I know what I am talking about). Russell Brand is now a Christian. J.D. Vance is now on the same ticket as Trump, and I am fully convinced Trump is not the same, either. I say this as an intro for all I am about to share, because I think this is a moment in history that deserves a pause and reflection. I share with, again, no incentive or tie to either party, but I am sharing my observations as someone who has plunged herself deep into conversations and dialogue with others very different from me (including my husband). I have been listening for a long time (even when they thought I wasn’t, because I am sneaky like that).
I think we are all trying to grapple with what is currently in front of us. A movement that has taken on a life of its own. The Republicans who pretend that what we have today is what was offered in 2016 are lying. And I’ll explain more on this later. (But I assure you that tattooed hispanic rappers were not rapping with General Flynn and Roger Stone dancing next to them in 2016).
We are all in this incredible historic moment ahead of the 2024 election, and I want to note the things I find impressive and remarkable.
I will say that this RNC was the most interesting and well done RNC I have ever seen. America got to see real, everyday Americans take the stage and express themselves, uncensored (unless you were watching Newsmax where the hosts think the viewers want to hear them over the invited speakers. Do better, guys).
It makes no sense to start at the RNC, though. This journey started a long time ago for me, and the observations are fruit of this journey, so let’s start at the pandemic. This was a turning point for both parties and our country.
During the pandemic, there was a lot of conflict and a wild erosion of rights once Biden entered the White House. (This is a fact, not an opinion). There was an attempt to force people to inject themselves with substances now proven to have done a lot of harm. (Remember the mandates?)The basis of many regulations was control. Idiot politicians who think we are stupid, like Andrew Cuomo, want to rewrite history, but we will not forget.
Not only did we see widespread suffering because of illness, separation and death, but also through the government imposed discrimination (and spineless scared people who went along with it), we saw arbitrary rules enforced and mass-firing and demonization of the unvaccinated.
In NYC, city workers who were fired for rejecting this injectable are still without relief or restitution. I find this criminal. My own life was made infinitely harder due to the vaccine mandates because I too said ‘no.’ And I am sharing this because this is the only way the rest of this makes sense. I am pretty sure HR still hates me. I was not having it. (The details of this are a story for another time). This was a wild time where people stopped talking to you based on your “vaccine” status. People had vax cards to enter a cafe or restaurant. My own church did not allow me to worship. I never went back to that church. You can read about the thoughts I had about this and true leadership (written in real time in posts from that time) here, in posts like this one.
I carried feelings of rage and defiance inside of me for a long time due to the discrimination and experiences of that time. I became a legal scholar on my own time regarding all things civil liberties and still dream of representing folks in those matters (maybe some time soon…) These mandates WILDLY altered and limited our lives in NYC and other large cities with corrupt and inept leadership. I couldn’t believe this was our country. I couldn’t believe this was the intellect of the people at large. I couldn’t believe how easy it was to manipulate the public. I couldn’t believe how censored I was (Twitter booted me several times– pre-Elon and X days). Ironically, it was not the first time I had felt ‘othered’, and interestingly, everything that got me censored ended up being correct information. It was an all too familiar feeling but one I did not like.
The pandemic was strange. I was in a city that had been mine for years, but I felt far from home, abandonned, trapped and alone. It was around this time that I found Dr. Naomi Wolf (a former progressive) leading the charge on all things vaccination and civil liberties (see her Pfizer Papers project). She did this tremendous work based on thousands of FOIA-requested documents with the War Room, the brainchild of Stephen K. Bannon (one could argue he is the main political strategist behind the MAGA movement). I can discern fear-mongering from any party and emotional manipulation (having been in religious circles my whole life, my radar for this is excellent). The same is admittedly sometimes present in War Room segments not unlike MSNBC or CNN– but as I witnessed this community with Dr. Wolf and Bannon, one thing became pretty obvious, they were brilliant.
In my own journey, as an officer of the court and someone who loves this country and has taken an oath to uphold its consitution, I also recognized their love of country. The ideals and values I cherish, too. I started watching semi-regularly, mostly as almost a case study to see how movement was structured and how to call people to action. I found a lot of fascinating things (also a post for another time).
I also started to sense, even two years ago, that this movement was shifting. And while I had heard and disliked some voices on this show (which I won’t name now), and had seen these same Republican darlings spew genuinely racist things on social media which I disagreed with and rolled my eyes at, I realized the party was and is morphing into something even they are trying to keep up with. It took on a life of its own. Some doors opened, and unexpected faces showed up. Some people are still adjusting to this. Get used to it.
And listen, the Republican party is not exclusively guilty of this, as much as people like to paint it as so. This is a humanity problem, not a party problem. Having worked for nonprofits that masquerade as nonpartisan but are pretty much marxist in ideology– I have witnessed the extreme vitriol, racism, self-loathing and self-righteousness the left offers. I have seen them obliterate excellence and reduce me and others to an identity. I saw progressives do it to each other and to our clients. I know what I have seen over the years, so don’t come at me like I am clueless. Trust me. I know what I know. Mama didn’t raise no fool.
Something major that has happened within the Republican party has been the new prominence of voices of color. If you say this was always the case, you are on crack. Let’s not pretend. Even a year ago, I was seeing prominent people in this same movement say some pretty atrocious stuff about minorities. If there is one thing I intensely dislike, it is the dehumanization of other people. That is forever unacceptable in my book.
With the literal death of mainstream media and the rise of independent journalist voices, I have also seen the rise of black and hispanic voices who are thinking beyond party lines and speaking and seeking truth. This is refreshing, and for the country in general, it is the only way forward.
Alongside the media voices, we also have a new genre of music artists breaking the charts with political music. As an Independent, I have also been excited to see the new dimension added to the political game with Bobby Kennedy Jr. as the third party candidate in the race. This man has an incredible intellect and career as an attorney (more accomplished and filled with integrity than all who call him crazy, I promise you that). This is all people have to try to shut down the emerging voices– insults. Crazy. Racist. Bigot.
Unlike these insults, honest words have power. Free words have power. We must never give that up.
One of the wisest things my father ever told me was to keep writing, because if I am writing, it means I am free. And make no mistake about it, I am free. Many are free. We, the collective, are free.
This political season has been filled with dimension and sparkle. Through my own research and seeking of truth during the pandemic, I came to know things that added tremendous context to what we have witnessed in the last week.
I think we have all come to what Russell Brand (now a converted Christian, which brings me joy) would call a “collective awakening.” Anyone awake and paying attention who has an honest bone in his/her body would admit nothing has been going well (by American standards) in this country for a long time. We have mistaken insanity for tolerance and unsustainable policies and expenditures for compassion. We live in a spiritual world, and darkness feels like it is closing in.
As a collective, we have also been witnessing the weaponization of our government and justice system. An exchange of civil liberties for illusive safety and petty personal revenge (labeled as justice) that does not exist. I don’t care what side you are on, this is a fact. I have spoken to shop keepers in NYC who have discussed this with me. You don’t have to be an attorney or legal mind to see what is so plainly wrong with what we have witnessed in the last year. It has left the thinking with unease. The implications of these things we are witnessing threaten our very way of life. Those in the legal profession who support political persecution and terrorism should be disbarred and stripped of their licenses. This is a violation of your oath. There is no way around that. Plain and simple. Our government and citizenry have behaved like petulant children willing to do anything to gain what they have decided they want.
What we witnessed last Saturday (the assassination attempt), left any feeling human shook. Trump’s reaction and control of the moment will live on in history as one of the most iconic moments in American history (whether you love him or hate him). I thought the frat boy photo was going to be the photo of the year (someone on IG said, “Frat boys are the most iconic American symbols.” As a state school grad, I can’t disagree). Another photo trumped that one.
Evan Vucci’s photo seen around the world and now on thousands of t-shirts.
Even Mark Zuckerberg (who I am not a fan of) said it was one of the most “badass” things he has ever witnessed personally in his life. Saturday’s events, had they played out differently would have likely taken us down an unrecognizable path. Yet, we all collectively witnessed a miracle.
Now, we can speed into this RNC week. It has lessons for all of us on all sides of the spectrum. Steve Bannon is in prison (still). I am convinced that someday, history will recognize that man as one of the most brilliant political minds of our time. (Marking my words here).
I remember Peter Navarro before he was sent to prison; he was so scared (can’t blame him). He would appear so cautious, and you could just see it in his eyes when he spoke. The Peter Navarro I saw speak at the RNC is a different man (in a good way. And good for him). He is unbreakable. I guess this is what happens when you don’t betray your convictions. With integrity, there is nothing to fear.
“They did not break me”
Amber Rose spoke. Mainstream media called her speech the most “dangerous.” Because God forbid a person of color think for themselves. Here for it. Be free, Amber. Be free.
The RNC played a Forgiato Blow x Amber Rose song as interlude. (This made me smile). More evidence of a clear shifting demographic and true inclusion.
This was the song they played.
It was clear Russell Brand and MTG became besties after meeting in person. I believe his words to her were, “I love the way you run your mouth. You are bloody lovely.” Both Brand and Lorenzo Sewell (Pastor Zo) shared testimonies and their journey with Jesus.
The only time I cried during the RNC was when the parents of Omer Neutra spoke. I could hear the anguish, passion and prayer in his mother’s voice. #BringThemHome This was a highlight for me, personally.
Another highlight– Guys, they brought the UNC frat boys to hold the flag. #iconic. This was pretty awesome.
Among other iconic and heartfelt speeches, we heard from gold star families, DeSantis (from my great state of Florida), Hulk Hogan (also from my great state of Florida), Tucker Carlson, Dana White, and J.D. Vance.
Icon.
Dennis Quaid made us all nostalgic for Parent Trap.
Spotted by Mark Walker.
I read J.D. Vance’s memoir a while back, and I have to say I am a fan. It was remarkable to see where his journey has taken him and to see his mom in the crowd. If you don’t know about his story, the trailer to the movie based on his memoir will give you an idea. He is a story (one of many) that reflects the American Dream.
Alina Habba, esq. was brilliant as always. Melania was glowing. (Can someone tell me who does their tans and teeth whitening? I have never seen whiter teeth than at this convention). Usha Vance was the epitome of grace.
The homage to the Comperatore family was a collective moment of grief and honor. Maybe I have overused the word “collective” in this post, but that is what we need more of in this country, no matter who you are and your own journey. Less arrogance. Less insecurity. More humility. More understanding. As Americans, we need unity. We need vision. We need a better tomorrow. This ain’t it.
As a country, we need to stop voting out of our traumas or the boxes people place us in. Stop voting out of envy or a desire for moral superiority defined by someone who doesn’t care. We need to stop letting outside voices tell us who we are as a country or who we should be. We need to mature. We need to call what is evil, evil and what is good, good. We need to celebrate.
Forty-five’s speech was probably one of the longest speeches I have ever sat through. I did appreciate the vision casting and call for unity. His final words were ones I can get behind. I share the sentiment.
“For too long, our nation has settled for too little. […] You’ve been told to lower your expectations and to accept less for your families. I am here tonight with the opposite message. Your expectations are not big enough. It is time to start expecting and demanding the best leadership in the world. Leadership that is bold, dynamic, relentless and fearless. We are Americans. Ambition is our heritage, greatness is our birthright, but as long as our energies are spent fighting each other, our destiny will remain out of reach and that is not acceptable.”
I think that, collectively, no matter what the next season holds, we are walking into a “next thrilling” chapter in American history. We have to make it so. The responsibility lies with us. I don’t care what party you align with or perhaps none, like me. But be free. Speak freely. Come to your own conclusions. Hold onto the promise and values of this country. Our eyes are wide open. Choose freedom.
GABRIELA YARELIZ 