“Every news consumer should be on guard against flimsy arguments or tendentious cuts. We can and should question journalists’ motives. But, if we demand that journalists have no motives at all, we’ll be forced to outsource the job to algorithms and drones, which are— so far, at least— even less thoughtful than humans.” Andrew Marantz, Main Streamers, The New Yorker, December 11, 2017.
D’Ormesson
“Jean Bruno Wladimir François de Paule Le Fèvre d’Ormesson was a French novelist. He was the author of forty books, the director of Le Figaro from 1974 to 1979, and the Dean of the Académie française.”
D’Ormesson passed away December 5, 2017. I am actually currently reading one of his books, Dieu, les affaires et nous. Several of his other books are on my reading list. His writing is unique, moving, and it has a way of lingering on the mind, even after you have finished the page.
A legend has departed, leaving us a great gift— his words. Philosopher, reporter, columnist and prolific letter writer, to stay with us forever. Because being a writer, makes you immortal.
#Mood
Sexual Harassment
By: Gabriela Yareliz
I listened to the incredible episode about sexual harassment on the Pardon My French- Atelier Doré podcast.
I am convinced that it is never too early to talk to our kids, siblings and friends about sexual harassment. I especially think parents need to sit down and have these important discussions about what is okay and not okay, at a young age. We need to show children that they have our support. We will act on their behalf. We will believe them. We will seek justice.
We can not perpetuate our culture, where so many women have felt trapped; and sometimes, even stunned and unsure of what has just happened to them.
We need to erase from our culture the attitude that says, “Why do anything about this? No one will help you/ believe you/ nothing will change/ you will just complicate matters.” We need to take action.
We need to be vocal.
And lastly, also important is our own behavior. Little eyes are watching us. Every time you raise your voice at someone, ignore someone, show disrespect, become volatile with someone, demean someone— children are watching and making this something that they think is normal and acceptable.
What is good, true, pure— these values and definitions start at home.
Make your voice and actions agents of change.
Monday Inspiration: November 27, 2017
By: Gabriela Yareliz
Happy Monday, my lovely friends.
I wanted to start off the week with the following thought. I was listening to a podcast on the train, as I often do. It was The Skinny Confidential, featuring guest Melissa Wood-Tepperberg (of @melissawoodhealth). She was sharing information about her health journey, past eating disorders, plant based living and belief. Super fascinating.
Something that caught my attention was that she begins the day with a very humbling prayer. It went something like:
“Where would you have me go? What would you have me do? What would you have me say? And to whom?”
I loved this. This prayer empties us of ourselves, our plans, our premeditation or ideas, and it comes to God and acknowledges His control over all things. It says, God, what would you like me to do? (Essentially).
I think a lot of our stress, tension and lack of gratitude comes from a heart that wants to control. I have even seen it in younger children, young adults and older adults who want to manipulate everything. It’s a disease that plagues humanity. And while this sometimes becomes our default operating method, if we believe in a God who loves us, it shouldn’t be.
This week, let’s practice this art of surrender. We will be happier when we do it. After all, the Christmas season is all about love. God’s insane love for us that He gave us the gift of Himself.
So on this Monday, join me in praying: God, where would you have me go? What would you have me say? What would you have me do?
November 23, 2017
HAPPY THANKSGIVING, MY BEAUTIFUL FRIENDS!
I am grateful for your friendship, messages and support, as I fill this page with thoughts, ideas and lessons learned.
I am grateful to Jesus who is the source of all good things in us and outside of us. He is merciful, loving and blessing us beyond our comprehension.
I hope you and your loved ones spend a restful day with delicious food. May you enjoy health, peace and joy, always.
XOXO
GY
Some (definitely not all) of the things I am grateful for:
God and faith
My boyfriend and love
An ever expanding family
My parents
My brothers
Health— all those cancer tests were negative!
My friend G passing the bar
Amazing friends, near and far
Learning more about health
Being able to read
My profession
Sunshine
Prayer
Oven mitts (and cooking with my lovelies)
Art (especially the joy that comes from watching people dance)
Being able to pay rent in this expensive city (I like how when I typed this, the emoji for NYC popped up. Apple knows…)
Being able to do ministry
Tacos
Laughter
The amazing young women around the world who serve God
Redemption (In every sense of the word)
How God speaks to our hearts
Seeing new places and the magic of the seasons
Reflections Before Bedtime #97
“Vive sin pretender, ama sin depender, escucha sin defender y habla sin ofender.”
“Live without pretending, love without depending, listen without defending and speak without offending.”
Thoughts on Grace
By: Gabriela Yareliz
As people who have had their fair share of disappointments or hurts, we often reflect and then adopt an attitude that says, “I shall not be fooled again.”
Most people see it as a virtue to expect the worst from people. (Especially in places that just drag the cynicism out of you on a daily basis, like New York City). Anything to the contrary is seen as naïve. You figure, it’s a smart move. Instead of being disappointed, you just call it out before it even happens and basically expect another person’s failure or mistake. When they fail, you aren’t surprised.
Yesterday, I was listening to a really great series recommended by a friend. The person speaking said that the happiest people don’t adopt this kind of attitude. Instead, they give people around them the benefit of the doubt. They bring out empathy, instead of cynicism.
Instead of being like “I knew you weren’t going to do what you promised” or making a misunderstanding come from the worst possible place, they understand.
I think that as people, we have long been wired to be cynical to protect ourselves. We believe people come from the worst place and are actively trying to hurt us.
When it comes to relationships with those we love and those who love us, it’s dangerous to allow this same attitude to filter through.
Misunderstandings are very real. None of us can read another’s mind; and disappointments can be inevitable. A person won’t always be on time or able to keep his or her promise. But rather than jumping to the worst possible conclusion when such a thing happens, (which I know I am not alone in doing, at times), what if we were filled with grace?
What if we thought, “X loves me. They don’t want to disappoint me. Obviously something happened, and it’s ok.”
I am good at this in some things and not so good in other areas. I am sure you, being human, have experienced the same. People’s past failures that brought us pain pop up, sometimes. But rather than having them pop up, let’s deal with them as our own issues. Often the person in front of us is not at fault. They really do love us or care for us. When we get mad or express disappointment, we hurt the person in front of us, who was simply trying his or her best. We make them afraid or make them dread us because then they feel like nothing they ever try will be good enough.
The truth is none of us is perfect. We have all been hurt. We all fail. We express our anger, fear, and cynicism at the most inopportune times.
I am sharing this deep flaw in me because I am sure I am not alone. I live in a city that thrives off of self-protection and being competitive.
My goal is not to be blind or taken advantage of, it’s to be graceful to those who love me and who do not actively try to disappoint me. And hopefully, as I develop and discipline myself to show that, not just in some things, but in all things, I will get that grace in return. And even if I don’t, just by bestowing grace, I will be a healthier, happier person because of it.
In what ways can you show more grace, today? Do you expect the best or the worst in people? Who do you want to be?
Thoughts on Gratitude
The cursor was blinking back at me for about a minute, and then, I remembered that I wanted to talk about gratitude. November always has a special emphasis on gratitude. It reminds us of how grateful we should be each and every day.
There is so much for which to be grateful. I feel like gratitude often gets bogged down by the latest thing our boss did to make our lives that much harder or some insane daily incident that brings us down. But it shouldn’t.
This morning, I read the following thought in the annual Revive Our Hearts Gratitude Challenge devotional:
“Gratitude is the overflow of a humble heart, just as surely as an ungrateful, complaining spirit flows out of a proud heart. Proud people are wrapped up in themselves.”
I found this to be interesting. And it led me to think about everything I have been so frustrated about or absorbed in. Sometimes, we are so busy looking at how we are treated, wronged or taken for granted, and we get focused on ourselves. And while all of those things hurt or cause pain and are wrong, we can’t change other’s actions. We can only change ourselves.
My friend can’t change how her husband treats her, but she can change herself. I can’t make a person appreciate me, but I can change my reaction.
What does it mean to be grateful in the humble way? The gratitude where we complain less, and we shine, despite thunderclouds around.
I feel like I want to work on that.
And beyond gratitude, it made me think about how many other things in my life that affect me negatively are perhaps on me because of my thoughts turning inward toward myself.
Maybe that’s the root of more
issues, not just unhappiness that stems from ingratitude. What else in our lives would change if we had humble gratitude?
There is so much we have that comes to us as a free gift. Today in church, we spoke about grace.
Grace is such a profound topic that we barely understand in a society where the focus is gaining or things being exchanged.
Sometimes, the first step is slowing down. Slowing way down.
“We are just ordinary people, maybe we should take it slow.” Wise words, John Legend.
Let’s slow down and find out what humble gratitude means. Let’s find out if we have accepted grace and figure out how to regift it.
While this may sound cliché, it’s profound, and I assure you we haven’t mastered it. But we should, and we can.
Reflections Before Bedtime #96
By: Gabriela Yareliz
“You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress, simultaneously.”
Sophia Bush
The past two weeks have been bumpy. I felt angry, at times hurt or sad, and at other times, completely overwhelmed.
NYC and everything that comes with daily life here just feels like it keeps escalating into chaos. It’s not a good feeling. I constantly wish I had handled something better or had more patience. This place seriously assaults your mental stability and sanity. I now understand why books exist about people who left NYC, written by the former New Yorkers.
That’s not the point. The point is I feel that sometimes we need to regroup. We search for security in flimsy things. We search for reassurance and structure in chaos.
Life is a reminder that all we seek is only in one place. Everything else is simply broken. And everyone else is hurt, too.
“Hurt people hurt people. That’s how pain patterns gets passed on, generation after generation after generation. Break the chain today. Meet anger with sympathy, contempt with compassion, cruelty with kindness. Greet grimaces with smiles. Forgive and forget about finding fault. Love is the weapon of the future.”
Yehuda Berg
Life is about the long walks. The embraces and joy. The pain where people held together and pressed through. Resilience and the relationship we forge with ourselves.
I hope that when this chapter ends and the next one begins, I am proud of who I became and that I will see that I was strong, brave and I endured the storm in beauty of character and soul.
GABRIELA YARELIZ 